Heaven Sent Gift: BOYS 

God trusted you to be the mother of your children. Genisis 33:5

He knew you would be your child’s mother even before you were created. 

You have been hand picked and molded for this job. I say job because of the nights where the 6 month old won’t sleep and the 4 YEAR old climbs in the bed with you giving you zero room thus zero sleep. 

Even with knowing God chose us for our children, we sometimes feel like we have no clue what we are doing. On top of that with the big hype about girls we feel like we have not met the expectation of family with boys. The prpressure is so high from every else about having a girl, so then the questions and lust rises for something we dont have rises . When am I going to get a girl? 

God created me to create these Harvey boys and no matter how bad I wanted a girl I haven’t gotten one yet. I am finally okay with that. I am okay because my husband and I are basically like Abraham and Sarah. I say this because, ITS THE TRUTH. Let tell you why, Abraham was the father of many nations annnndddd. Well having boys, we are basically creating generations here. 

WAIT-    you mean to tell me I was not satisfied with boys? I must have misunderstood my blessing! 

My husband  and I were created to create generations? God trusted us to raise two generations already? This is beyond amazing to me. While everyone is all gun ho for little girls, and their bows and dresses and hair and shoes and their chubby cheeks I can go for days…. And #wegirlsright hashtags. What about the boys that will soon become men? The ones who will raise and provide for their families? The world right now, yeah already lacking leaders and don’t let me tag on great African American male leaders.  But little ol  me, here in Indiana was created to create the beginning of the Harvey generations? What a blessing from God. 

How are you feeling about being a mother of boys? There was once a time where people would kill to have a boy and now something has changed.  Has this made you desire something that God hasn’t given you yet? Be content with the season you are in, because one day you will look up and that season will be over and you’ll wish it stayed longer. 

Don’t be so caught up in the “hype”.  I feel abundantly blessed to be the mother of two handsome boys. You should too.  You need to know your job is bigger than ever before you are creating generations to come. 
 Planes , trians, trucks and toys I thank God for the Harvey boys!❤

I Know My Name

1 Peter 2:9

My name is NOT victim. My name is NOT liar. My name is  NOT outcast. My name is NOT  weird.  My name is  NOT  bad. My name is NOT Teresa or Larry. My name is NOT sexy. My name is NOT fat. My name is NOT ugly. My name is NOT insecure.  My name is NOT abandoned. My name is NOT cry baby. My name is NOT left out.

My name is Asiret Harvey and I am:

1 Peter 2:9

Growing up I have been called so many different names that I identified as. The names above describe what people either saw me as or the label they put over my life. 

There are many reasons why our generation and the ones under us are not becoming who they really are.

The desire to live up to the name they are being called. Not saying the child acts bad because of the title you gave them. BUT why not be bad if you already have claimed that over their life? 

The power of life and death is in your toung- Proverbs 18:21

Don’t be shocked when your child acts out in school when you have claimed death over their life. Don’t be shocked when you have claimed defeat over them even before they started. Speak life into your children! Do not  allow family to instil death in their life either. 

It is NOT disrespectful to stand up for your children. God made you accountable for them. 

Speak up for your children.

 Speak to your children. 

Let your child know that when someone calls them jealous, that is NOT their name. When someone calls them bad that is NOT their name. Don’t be  ashamed to correct that person who is calling your child out of their name. You set the tone in your child’s life. If you allow others to speak over them your allowing that death to enter into their life. You do not know the impact that will have over them for forever

The death labels given to me over my life had their way in my life for many years now. The only difference now is I KNOW MY NAME

I went to a conference this weekend Shout out to #Holynation 2017. This conference made me get completely out if my comfort zone. It made me confess things I’ve never confessed. It made me worship like I never had before. It made me lose my voice, but most IMPORTANTLY it gave me true confidence to walk in my NAME.

If I told you that someone’s breakthrough was waiting on you getting uncomfortable would you believe me? If I told you that the enemy has been using others to give you names that dont belong to you..would you believe me? When you walk in a different name, your purpose is not being fulfilled. When your purpose is not being fulfilled your testimony becomes distorted. When your testimony is distorted it is only holding someone else’s healing back. This walk is not just about you.  The enemy is banking on you not knowing your name. Don’t let him get the victory. You are:

1 Peter 4:9

But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God‘s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light.

Importance of Godly Friends 

I was asked to write a post about friendship. I decided to write a post about the importance of a GODLY friendship. 

1 Corinthians 15:33-Bad company corrupts good character. 

Character: The mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual. 

Company: A visiting person or group 

Wait for it ….

Visiting: 1. To go and spend time with OR

2. Punish ; of something harmful or unpleasant.  

Corrupt: Morally deprived 

When you call your friend upset,  at the end of your conversation are you ready to “pop off?” Or are you feeling convicted and ready to ask for forgiveness? Are you calm or are you morally deprived

Let’s not front ladies our friends are our hype man. 

*in This case hype woman.

They have the ability to make your confidence jump from 0 to 100 real quick. But is that friend building your confidence in the sight of what is right to God? Or are your friend’s mental and moral qualities causing you to fall short at the end of your test? 

It is important to have friends and maintain friendships yes. But more importantly it is important to find someone to hold you accountable even in those angry moments. It’s so easy for us as wives and mothers to become bitter. It’s even easier if our hype man is not your accountability partner. 

Single mom, mad at her child’s father doesn’t put him on child support and her friends response.  “Giiirrrlll, you are better than me I would get him for every dime he got.” 

Married woman husband cheats on her , friends response.  He is nothing  but a dog, divorce him now before it’s too late. 

Single woman with no children but her clock is ticking friends response. “You better find you a man soon or shoot just get pregnant and take care of the baby by yourself. 

When you are spending time and entertaining the thoughts of bad company your characteristics start to change. And before you know it your a bitter baby momma, divorced or pregnant and the only thing you have is the encouraging word of a friend who was only meant for a season. 

Make a covanat with your friends to be an accountability partner for one another. 

It’s important to find friends to encourage the right things. Maintaining this type of friendship is KEY when on the journey of motherhood and being a wife. We can get SO caught up in our home and tasks that we don’t even realize we are slipping. It’s up to us to maintain and nourish our friendships.  These friendships are motivating , convicting,  and fueling in our lives.  If Bad company corrupts good character.  Good company must encourage good character. 

My accountability partner and I have been friends for over 9 years and we have held eachother accountable the entire time. We encourage eachother to do the right thing even if it costs the others feelings. She puts me in check when I am wrong and I do the same to her. I trust her enough to call me out and I trust her even more to listen to her when she does. She has encouraged me as a wife and a mother. Most importantly she has encouraged me to be a better Christian and holds me accountable for the covanat I have made with Christ. 

We will be your friend goals. 😋

Forgiveness 

My momma, she left me. 

She left.

People make forgiveness sound so simple. It’s not, forgiveness is hard, ugly and beautiful one after another.

I was about five years old. My mother and father were getting high, I remember my mother not wanting to. I remember the blue band tied around her arm and her running from my father in the living room. I remember her tripping over the coffee table onto the couch. My dad on the other side picking up the ash tray and throwing it at her face. I remember the ash tray breaking and the glass on my mother lips. I remember running over and her crying. I still feel the deep hurt from my heart deep into my belly just from telling the story. I remember her screaming “I have to pee!” She walked me to my room gave me a kiss and told me to lock my door, go under my bed and don’t come out. I remember the hug she gave me. It resembeled the hugs I give my children when I leave for work. Then, my bathroom was directly across from my room about 5 feet in distance. I remember doing what she said and about 10 minutes went by when I heard my dad bang on the bathroom door calling out her name. “Terisa! Come out.” I could hear the water from the faucet. I wondered what was happening. Until I got from under the bed a looked under the door. I see my dad kick down the door. Oh,  man he was livid. The window to the bathroom was open and she was gone. 

She left me. 

My dad came to my door and began banging, I thought he was going to break the door down. He didn’t, he yelled “Asiret you better not come out of that room. ” I didn’t. Back then my sister lived directly across the street from us. I could look out of my bedroom window and see the front of her house. I stayed in that room and watched her leave and come back home. She didnt even realize anyonr waa home. I cried and cried hoping she would come and knock on the door. On the second day I gathered up the courage to disobey my dad and walk across the street. There was my brother n law. “Where is your dad Asiret?” “I don’t know, I’ve been home for two days by myself. ”

That was the day I started living with my family members on and off. 

She never came back for me.

She left me. 

Growing up my heart always wanted my mother. Nothing anyone did filled the void of my mother. It wasn’t until I understood that Jesus could be my mother, my father, my family and my friend. However at 5 I definitely did not realize that. It was SO bad I used to ask the people I lived with if I could call them mom. Even when I did that, it just wasn’t the same. I always thought if I could just live with her again, it would be so simple. I grew up with so many mixed feelings. So confused. So many tears. So insecure. So frustrated. Was I not good enough for a mother? 

It wasn’t until after I got married that I realized my mother wanted me as much as I wanted her. I was SO mean to her on my wedding day. So embarrassed of her. I was worried about what others would think. I was worried about how people thought of her. 

The true forgiving processed happened after that day. I went from hate, to embarrassed, to sad , to understanding and hurting for her hurts. I will never understand what it took for her to get to the point where she felt like she had to leave her child in order for her to keep her life. The decision she made to know I would be better off until she got herself together. Now, i admire her for her choice. It was a selfish yet selfess decision. I can still hear the pain in her voice when she calls me. I had to let her know I am sorry and I love her just the way she is. I will forever cherish every moment we will get it the future. 

When you need to forgive make sure you realize that it takes time and hard conversations. It take tears and realization. Most importantly it takes you being willing to be honest about your situation and confronting the problem. There will be no forgiveness without truth. 

“Forgiveness comes from the truth, which is from the root.”- Asiret Harvey

Mommy & me March 2014

Can You Stand The Rain?

Oh man! I remember the day after our wedding we had to move into our new place. I remember waking up and I kept thinking to myself, I am a wife? I am a wife! The title made me feel so entitled to EVERYTHING. I felt like my husband should wait on me hand and foot. I mean the bible says he should leave me without spot or blimish.( so young and and selfish) I felt like he should buy me trips and diamonds. I definitely put the world on his shoulders without even supporting his dreams.. After the initial high of about a week, things went completely back to normal. Life doesn’t really change after you get married. You don’t fall into some surreal spell and all your issues go away.  You don’t all of a sudden become entitled to say what ever you want and do whatever you want. That does NOT happen. Reality hits when the dirty clothes need to be washed, when your child needs attention and when two completely different lives need to be meshed together. It’s not like you guys have all of the same ideas and were taught all of the same things. Let me be honest for a second. The only thing I felt I knew about being a wife was to love my husband. However, I was completely wrong. The bible tells me to respect that man, not love him. And let me tell you the truth one more time, I’ve had a difficult time with authority and having to respect someone when my emotions get involved. Being a wife, being intentional is probably the best advice I can give. Right after  I got married I was told that one day my husband will trade me in for a younger newer model. I had to walk out of that house and ask God to take that away from me.  Let me tell you as wives be careful who you let give you advice. As a wife you set the tone in your home. You must be intentional with who and what you allow in your home.  That woman obviously had her own issues she had not delt with yet. Be intentional about who you let speak into your life. As a woman we see differently than men do. That’s why God gave us to him to help him. They literally need our help and we need their leadership. I like to the think that my husband has all the answers and can see everything I can see. However, if that was the case, if we were exactly the same one of us would not be needed. Be intentional about protecting your home. PRAY over every situation. BE INTENTIONAL about every conversation,  every argument, every date. Being a wife is so much more than butterflies and happy days.. Being married is about forgiveness,  openness,  honesty and hurt. You have to be willing to say “I know your going to hurt me at some point and I would not want to be hurt by anyone but you. ” Be intentional about your marriage!

Can you stand the rain?

Where’s My Milk Supply? 

As many of you know I have a milk snatcher at home. I am a breastfeeding momma! Breastfeeding did NOT come easy to me. I was not one of those mothers who had an abundance of milk with little to no effort. I have had to put in sweat and tears for this milk. (I’m pretty sure I will experience having to give blood for it too #babiesbite) After giving birth to this milk snatcher I had the thought of quitting. It was SO painful to breastfeed from my nipples down to my stomach. My stomach was literally contracting! That did NOT happen with my first child. However, my husband has been the BEST motivator when it comes to breastfeeding. From helping  buy pills, getting me water when i’m feeding, making me food and the best for me is his encouraging words [I am a words of affirmation woman]. He has just been the best and I love him dearly! Ladies make sure you have a great support system. If that isn’t an option for you PRAY. I can not tell you how often I have been down in the dumps about my milk and I would turn off my phone and spend time with God and boom my “let down” came in.

A few facts:

  •  I went back to work 5 weeks after I had my youngest son.
  • I had previously never breastfed longer than 2 months [my oldest got teeth. Yes! At 2 months ]
  • I pump Monday-Friday and strictly breastfeed on the weekends AND anytime I am with my son.

Below you will find a list of things that has, and has not  worked for me during this season in my life. Remember every woman is different and consistency is KEY.

  • Clear your mind – Get off of that phone! Spend some time with God. Use this time to worship him! After all he is allowing you to be the only source of food for your child ! How amazing is that?
  • WATER– How I had to think of this is when fluid is leaving my body I need to replace it for the baby AND myself. I Try to drink 2x’s as much as I let out. I can NOT express how important water is.
  • Motherslove Milk Plus Pills– These are the life and soul of my MILK. I take these 2-3 times daily and after taken it for about 3 days I witnessed my milk supply go from 3oz to 6-7 oz
  • Lactation Cookies– Not only do these taste AMAZING but they have the 2 ingredients below that also help with lactation
  • Oatmeal– I like to use the steel cut oatmeal. It taste so much better to me. Definitely helps with the supply.
  • Brewers Yeast – If you are willing to put in the work for the cookies to save a little from the pills I would encourage you to don’t that. Brewers yeast has increased my supply before I started taking mothers milk.

Fenegreek- this is inside my Motherslove pills. There are also capsules of just fenugreek on Amazon. Do NOT buy the powder and put it in tea, I thought I was going to puke from the taste.

Power Pump- This has helped me SO much. My milk would be running low and I would power pump and BOOM my boobs were hard as a rock for the next feeding.

Pump 20 mins rest 10. Pump 10 mins rest 10. Pump 10 mins. You need to do this 3×’s that day.

Do not get discouraged. Give it a least 3 months. Stay consistent and get that support if you can! You got this. Your milk will fluctuate. I have cried so many times  over my milk supply not coming in how I want. Stay the course.

Coffee– I have been told caffeine lowers your milk supply. Coffee is something I just have not given up. If you are having a hard time with your milk supply maybe you should cut back on your daily caffeine inake.

Mint- If anyone knows me I LOVE MINT. Mint ice cream, hairwash, bodywash, candy. I use to wash up with Trader Joe’s body wash. This was my daily spa experience! Unfortunately washing my entire body every day with this , I noticed a decrease in my supply.

If you have any questions about my routine, how I make my cookies, or anything else feel free to comment and I will replay as soon as possible. I look forward to hearing from you all and I pray this has encouraged and helped you momma 😚.

Carter Harvey AKA “milk snatcher”

Lets Get Real About PostPartum 

Depression is real. If you are going through a time of depression I pray you seek God out on this. I pray you are healed and delivered and honest about your situation. At 19 I had my first child. My entire pregnancy I had prepared for this amazing experience of labor. I eagerly waited for the moment my child was placed into my arms. Not realizing the right way to prepare spiritually. Not realizing that at that moment none of that would happen. No one informed me about postpartum and what signs I should look for. No one helped me understand the importance of God giving me this beautiful child to raise. No one told me the reality of it all. The moment my son was placed in my arms there were about 10 people in my room and after being cut, stiched, and just plain out of my comfort zone my child was taken to the table to be cleaned off then placed on my chest. You know the moment everyone tells you is amazing? Yeah, I must have missed it. They placed my son on my chest and immediately I felt no connection. As I sat in the room with what felt like a million people I couldn’t cope or concentrate on one of the biggest blessings in my life. I thought to myself , maybe it will come over time, maybe after a couple of days. Nope, didn’t happen. I spent the first week not coming out of my room. I was SO overwhelmed and could not stop crying. As time passed, I felt like it couldn’t get any worse. I could not control my emotions. At any given time I would just break down, I felt like no one understood. My now husband tried his best to understand but the more scared I got about my situation the more I felt like someone would take my child away from me. I did not get help because I had a huge fear of losing my son. How I wish I would have just prayed and fasted. It took about three months before I actually accepted the fact that I was a mother and that I had a son. Now, I would not change being a mother for anything. I see my little boy and I want everything that God has in store for him. I always pray for my children, their wives and their chidren.  If you are depressed and need someone to talk to my suggestion would be go to God. Cast ALL of your cares onto him, he loves you more than you know. Seek council earlier than later. The longer you wait the worse it will get. Stop allowing your self to be stuck in a situation you don’t have to be in. In order to love your children you have to love yourself. It’s easy to fake the funk and pretend everything is okay when your really dying inside. Your children pick up on this and you are only damaging them. #gethelp

Christian & Mom 2015

Let Me Introduce Myself

Screenshot_20170727-193328Asiret [Ash-er-ret] Harvey.

I am a Christian, a wife of a handsome marine (Rah) and a mother of two beautiful boys ages 4 and 4 months. I have always had a calling on my life for women and children. This is why my life has led me to be a therapist for children on the Autism Spectrum. I grew up mostly in Indiana but spent some time in Arizona. My childhood did not consist of living with my mother and father until I became an adult. Instead, I lived with multiple family members, friends, and  people who I now consider mentours. I would describe my childhood/Young adult life as difficult. Partly due to myself , partly due to other things but MOSTLY to mold me into the woman  I am today. I became a mother at the age of 19 in 2012. Then became a wife at 22 in 2014.  Now, I am a mother of two, and a wife at the age of 24 in 2017. (Note: this is the sole reason fot the order of Mom, Wife, Home.) I have experienced a number of trials and tribulations through this time and would like to help you along your way through my stories. Follow me as I give you a flash back of the things I have overcome, the things I am currently going through and the success stories that might help you in this awsome, scary, thrilling walk through Christianity, Motherhood, Wifely duties and home making. 🤗